So I've had an animated short stuck in limbo for a good long while now. It's a bit of crazy to talk about, but I feel I need to cast off the demons.
And that's just it. There shouldn't be demons, yet there are. It's always: "What if it isn't good enough?" or "Maybe I should redo this bit." and it stacks up to never getting done. (I've even tried to revisit it in the last few days and now my Flash has gremlins and won't let me publish for reasons currently unresolved.)
There's also the factor of it being a mirror. It's personal, you know? If it isn't great and well received... and it's a reflection of my psyche like art should be, then wham. Not the funnest punch-in-the-face.
I remember a day when I took a old girlfriend to Dallas to meet with the Peace Corps. She was going to go away and I knew I would probably never see her again, no matter our relationship at the time. I wasn't going to stop her from going just because of me. So she went to the interview and I went looking for a bar... at 10am in the morning. By the time she got out at 1pm, I was drunk, trying to drown AND hide my fear. She didn't go. I lost her anyway. The fear was not unjustified. I just didn't look both ways before crossing that street.
So the blind-side hit causes me to not get this short done. Not deciding is a decision. But the indecision is keeping me from finishing it and moving on to bigger things, because I can't move on until I complete it.
The skills need to be honed. They seemed sharp as a razor last winter when I had myself convinced I would finish the short by the deadcenter deadline. I didn't. Not because I couldn't, but because I couldn't face the finished product and what that could possibly mean. It's all me. Nobody did a lick of it. Maybe that's part of the problem. Maybe I need to find other animators to bounce ideas off of and get some collaboration going.
Meanwhile, I've got 1.2 minutes of a 2.3 minute short in the can. At 30 fps, that's only 4,140 frames to go.
In a paraphrased quote attributed to Chuck Jones, "Everybody has 10,000 bad drawings in them and it's best to get them out as soon as possible."
Since I won't post it if it isn't complete, I can only give this screenshot to offer any proof at all, if it's any proof at all.
